((Some Insights into Jaxom. Videos might be NSFW))

For being focused on kicking ass with a sword, playing Jaxom feels more like dancing than most of my characters.  The people I play are always influenced by the creative shit I'm dealing with in my life; Jaxom's a product of YouTube music, mostly.

So, here's my take on Jaxom.

Here's what casting a spell as a conduit of the Divine feels like:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3gw0iD5y0Q

Or the general religious feeling:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4mA8H1dwHE

And here's what fighting feels like:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UR0UkTiKxmc

Or maybe like this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRSijEW_cDM

Or perhaps more like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABz2m0olmPg

Maybe you have to get past the first minute, with that one.  She dances in heels and a pretty green dress.  Jaxom fights in a Breastplate with a sword consecrated to his Goddess.

Yup.  Jaxom has an internal life and an external life and he is at peace with how in tune each of those is with the other.  His life is conflict and his life is in conflict.

Here are a couple of feels about being an Inquisitor, a strange not-paladin kind of Holy Warrior:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORFQrSDyyNY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8PVTiknvs4

Wish I could put my finger on those feels better - they're a bit ineffable.  Sarenrae is both terrible and awesome in all sorts of senses of those words.  I have thought almost as much about Sarenrae as I have Shiva or Kali, and only slightly less than Buddha, as far as religious figures go.

"But Jaxom," I imagine you asking, "What is it REALLY like to be a half-orc, a former paladin and current inquisitor, looking back at the first part of your life and dedicating yourself to a different god, a softer god, with all your experiences?"

"Well, abstract idea of an interlocutor, I would say it's pretty good.  Things are good and I have good friends and a job that's engaging and interesting."

"No no - I mean your secret life.  Your dreams that you would never reveal to anyone except in the whisper darkness-est of deepest night.  Something that your armor and your weapon and your faith protects you from?"

"Oh.  Yes, I see.  Here are two, secret dream-songs that capture my nightmares and secret shameful desires most accurately."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2kzLAOKUQQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdabIfmcqSQ

But - is Jaxom creative?  Does he have a rich internal fantasy life, or is he just fears and rage and danger?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72oM5cTvnIs